She Needed Me
by Ramonks33
Summary: AU: Modern day Finnick and Annie. She needed him, and he failed her. He couldn't save her from herself. And he will regret it forevermore. Warnings of suicide, angsty Finnick and sadness, please R&R! Dedicated to percabeth1414


She Needed Me

**A/N: Hey everybody! Here's a little angsty fic, because I am super terrible, and this goes out to percabeth1414! Love you, V! Dedicated to her, and all my friends, have a good new year! (Trying to write at least half of what I wrote in 2012…shush. Warnings of suicide, and sad Finnick.**

"Today," Reverend Phillips began, as he stared at the congregation. All the citizens of their small town had loved the girl who had died, and even now, it still hurt to speak of her, "We are here to mourn the loss, and celebrate the life of Annaliese "Annie" May Cresta." He stops to wipe his own tears, remembering the sweet young girl. How beautiful did she look in her state of death, as much as she was alive. Adorned in a beautiful turquoise and white dress, her hair was brushed back over her shoulders, and in her hands she held a bouquet of green and white flowers. What was fortunate is that the pained look on her face was gone for good. The way her hands would twitch , they were completely still now. And the most wondrous eyes, an estranged green, that would shine with hope and love…not anymore.

Finnick Odair listened to the man talk about her. Her. Annie Cresta, one of his best friends she forgot to cherish. He had been her friend ever since pre-school, and now, she was gone. All because he wasn't there in her time of need. That wonderful, eccentric, astounding girl he once knew. The one he had loved. The one he couldn't save.  
He fiddled with his phone, trying to stop the tears from falling, but they continued to fall on the screen. The tears lingered on the picture he stared at, when it had just been him and Annie. In the picture, they just won a baseball game, being declared the champions. They had only been in junior high then. In the photo, Finnick had his arm around her, and her tangled brown hair was matted with dirt. His own hair was hidden by that goofy blue and white baseball hat, but those were the days of his naïveté. Those were the days when life had been good to him, when it just didn't matter who your friends were and what brand you wore. When life had been fair to the poor and unfortunate. Those were the days before they arrived to High School, and all their childhood feelings would be ripped away. It was his entire fault she was gone. The reason she did it was because of him.

Finnick had risen to the top ranks in the High School, his looks and his charming attitude befriending many. Annie, however, had fallen to the bottom. Every day, she would try to speak to him, tell him about her day just like before. However, he would always be with one of his other friends, Peeta or Cato or some other. It was like she was invisible. She would give up, and then go home, dispirited. On the rare occasions she managed to speak to him, he would never talk about anything she would like to. Mostly about the sports teams, or the girls. She would simply walk away after moments of useless attempts. Almost was never enough for Annie.

He supposed it was that one phone call. That one fateful call he never picked up, because he was too drunk with the intensity of vodka shots in his system. He had been at a party, a wild one, with Gale, Cato and Peeta. When his IPhone began to ring, with Annie's school photo displayed on the screen, he hit ignore. Repeatedly. He had known Annie had been suffering depression and insomnia, but at the time he was frankly annoyed that she was bugging him like this. He had assumed Katniss or Clove would answer. But that was not the case when they found her dead on the floor, with two entire vials of sleeping pills beside her.

He wiped the tears, trying to be strong. But he knew deep, deep down things would never be the same. Because he loved Annie Cresta. He still loved her, but God had stolen her away to prove that he never deserved her. He never deserved her sunshine, and it showed how much he really needed her. She was his rock, his lifeboat, his lifeline that kept him anchored to sanity. But now, as he watches her body being sent away in a low, carved coffin, he realized she had needed him. And he hadn't helped her, in her time of need. She was lonely, and he knew when he needed her, she loved him so. She had never betrayed his trust and he had, by not catching her as she fell.

The service was followed by a burial, and the entire town followed the coffin carriers as they headed down to the graveyard. It was gloomy, the rain darting their clothes, and many pulled out umbrellas in black, in honor to their fallen child. Finnick refused, letting the rain soak him. If he got sick and died, then at least he'd be able to tell her how much he really loved her. He never really for that chance.  
As they lowered the coffin into the grave, he began to cry softly, not even hesitating to suppress it. He didn't care anymore, he just didn't fucking care. It had been his fault, and she had needed him. And he failed her. The spectators broke into a song Annie had loved one of Annie's favourite song. Finnick missed her voice, singing it ever so softly, but full of passion.

_ "Bless the Lord, O My Soul,  
'O My Soul, Worship His Holy Name  
Sing like never before, 'O My Soul  
I'll Worship His Holy Name."_

Their voices joined as one, and Finnick sang as well, letting his voice ring throughout the sullen crowd. Let the harassment and embarrassment he would get come, because he was crying over the crazy girl who he never knew. He could take this. Nothing was worse than this burning sensation inside that he could've saved her from herself.

_"And on that day, when my strength is failing…" _

His strength was already failing, as well as his sanity, because she was gone…

_"The end draws near, and my time has come…"_

Why did it have to be so soon? Why did God have to take his sunshine away so quickly?

_"Still my soul will sing your praise unending…"_

He will never stop singing sorrowfully, as long as she needed him. And as far as he knew, he needed her just as much.

_"Ten thousand years and then forevermore."_

That's how long Finnick James Odair will regret his actions. Ten thousand years and more so, to remember his Annie. His wonderful, amazing, precocious, estrange little Annie. Who he couldn't save, and who he will love forevermore.


End file.
